Dinner With Henry 111: Lazy Afternoon

Andre dropped a dab of cream into the chocolate burlee sauce simmering on the range, and then he slipped the spoon into his mouth. "Mmmmmmm, is that good or what?"

"I don't know, you haven't given me any."

Andre grinned and poked his spoon into the air. "You will just have to take my word for it, Shakespeare."

Midafternoon in the kitchen was surprisingly uneventful that day. The sun seemed to mirror the dull feeling with an unwavering steady glow in a cloudless blue sky over Delancey Street. Birds tired from flapping their wings all morning lounged on rooftops, yawning like newborns. A grey mouse fell asleep behind the stove while waiting for burlee droppings to fall.

"You know something, Shakespeare, it is nice to have a nice quiet day after all that excitement yesterday with Maria, and her late beagle."

"I'm glad I didn't have to see that," Shakespeare said, tugging on Andre's leg.

"It was a good day to be a blind midget," Andre said while he rolled his eyes, "I don't think I will ever be able to erase that horrible image from my mind. It will no doubt be the cause of nightmares for many many years to come. That poor beagle's legs hanging out of Clarissa's mouth like spaghetti."

That is when Diego entered the kitchen laughing. "You know I thought those dog legs looked more like chicken legs." She stood shaking her hips, snapping her gum and sighing while waiting for Andre's jaw to stop dropping.

"You know something, Diego?" Andre said, stirring the sauce, "I am surprised even you would take this so lightly; the murder of an innocent beagle. What did that poor dog ever do except wind up as a pawn in one of Maria's psychotic delusions?"

Diego blew a bubble and said, "That beagle's eyes were very intense."

Andre mockingly slapped his head, "Oh, then of course he deserved to die. And will you stop playing with that gum?"

"Can I have a cigarette instead?"

"No."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

Suddenly, tears ran from Shakespeare's eye sockets. He toppled over and began to cry.

Andre then rushed to Shakespeare's side. "What is wrong, Shakespeare, why are you crying?"

Shakespeare rubbed his eye sockets and said, "I am missing so much because I am blind. I know I make jokes, but it makes me so sad, so much of the time. That is why I'm so bitter."

Diego snapped her gum and sighed, "We already knew that."

"Yes," Andre said, tipping his hat, "Why are you being such a drag, Shakespeare?"

That's when a mysterious mist fell over the kitchen and Sincere came walking through it, grinning her crooked-teeth grin. Sincere stood over Shakespeare and said, "I can give you back your eyesight, but I'll need a kidney."

"Go away, Sincere," Diego breathed.

"I wish you would all go away!" Shakespeare said, and then he stood up and bolted from the kitchen.

"Look what you have done now, Diego!" Andre cried while he pointed his spoon at Diego.

Suddenly, Henry stepped through the doorway. Alarm in his eyes, he cried, "What is going on? And where did all this mist come from?"

Diego blew another bubble and sighed out, "It came with Sincere."

Andre cried, "Diego, will you PLEASE STOP PLAYING WITH THAT GUM!"

Henry sighed and said, "Wonderful, another uneventful day in the kitchen. Say," he continued while he stood next to Diego, and looked towards Andre, "Has anyone seen Maria?"

Meanwhile, in the loft, under the lazy sun, Her black eyes darted and jumped and peeled, while Her bulbous head swung down far as She could make it reach.

Maria, cornered between Clarissa's feet and her tentacles, wept, and she said, "Please let me go. I beg you, Madam, please let me go!"

Then came Clarissa's long buzz, " No, Maria, you are not going anywhere, maybe ever again. Did you think I would forget that you tried to kill me, on several occasions? Did you think I would forget?"

"Well," Maria said, shrugging.

"Think again," Clarissa buzzed and then her huge head dropped even lower and her mouth opened wide. Her long tongue slithered out. Her teeth shone like chrome.

The grey mouse that was behind the stove waiting for burlee drippings sighed, and took a nap.